Where Is the Cake?!

In case you were wondering, NO, this is NOT a Portal/GlaDos reference.

It is a reference to the stupidest children’s song every to have mortified this planet. It is in Hebrew, which is already bad, because Hebrew is not a particularly pleasant language. The bulk of the song is this: “Where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is the cake?” – The number of “where is”s is NOT exaggerated. I counted.

It’s bad enough to have to listen to that horrible monotonous song over and over, but what’s worse is that’s accompanied by the need to listen to horrible pop songs as well. All of these lovely tunes drifting, or rather pounding, through the windows of the house from the birthday party in the park. Of the hits I got to listen to over and over this afternoon: “I Want It That Way”, “It’s In Your Eyes”, “The Ketchup Song” and “The Macarena”. If you haven’t heard of any of these songs, consider yourself extremely fortunate.

I wouldn’t be quite as negetive if I didn’t know that it’s illegal to use huge speakers in our park. I’d like to hang signs up all over the park requesting, eloquently and politely, for people to stop using illegal loudspeakers for their children who are NOT deaf. Perhaps something along the lines of “You and your crotch-droppings suck for abusing my eardrums!” would suffice.

EDIT: Paul McCartney sang an awesome concert and is very much alive. Just so you know.

Cops are… helpful? What’s happened to the world?

I have great belief in the police force. Ok. Well. That’s a lie. I’ve never had to deal with them all that much, but watching The Wire does put our boys in blue in perspective. Mostly cause half of them aren’t even in blue. Decieving buggers.

Tonight though, I encountered two policemen doing very unexpected things. I was driving with Ms. M and Mr. B. B. and I was standing at a stoplight, waiting for the green light. Of course, because this is Israel, a woman in a hideous white SUV tried to push in front of me so she could turn left. A cop car was a few cars behind me, and a very pissed off elderly cop actually made the effort to get out of his car and go up to her window and yell at her to get back into her lane and not inconvenience everyone else and hold up traffic. Of course she ended up turning left illeagaly anyway, but still, the point was made.

The second thing that happened tonight was again, at a stoplight. This time the squad car was in front. A man walked up to the window and seemingly asked directions. Then he smilingly got into the front seat of the car. Meaning the policeman inside offered a lift. This is another piece of courtesy that is unknown of here.

Next post might or might not mention if Paul McCartney was or was not assassinated during his concert here that is tomorrow night.