Love
I plugged you in,
You seemed to work,
Until I discovered,
A little quirk.
Lines appeared
Upon the screen,
They made me sad
At what they did mean.
Earthbound, Batman,
Aladin and Racecar,
All worked slightly,
But not enough by far.
I shall not give up,
I refuse to, I do!
For I love you so much
That it’s almost not true.
So hang in there, SNES,
My consoling friend,
Don’t let this be
Your one final end.
In case you were wondering, NO, this is NOT a Portal/GlaDos reference.
It is a reference to the stupidest children’s song every to have mortified this planet. It is in Hebrew, which is already bad, because Hebrew is not a particularly pleasant language. The bulk of the song is this: “Where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is, where is the cake?” – The number of “where is”s is NOT exaggerated. I counted.
It’s bad enough to have to listen to that horrible monotonous song over and over, but what’s worse is that’s accompanied by the need to listen to horrible pop songs as well. All of these lovely tunes drifting, or rather pounding, through the windows of the house from the birthday party in the park. Of the hits I got to listen to over and over this afternoon: “I Want It That Way”, “It’s In Your Eyes”, “The Ketchup Song” and “The Macarena”. If you haven’t heard of any of these songs, consider yourself extremely fortunate.
I wouldn’t be quite as negetive if I didn’t know that it’s illegal to use huge speakers in our park. I’d like to hang signs up all over the park requesting, eloquently and politely, for people to stop using illegal loudspeakers for their children who are NOT deaf. Perhaps something along the lines of “You and your crotch-droppings suck for abusing my eardrums!” would suffice.
EDIT: Paul McCartney sang an awesome concert and is very much alive. Just so you know.
I have great belief in the police force. Ok. Well. That’s a lie. I’ve never had to deal with them all that much, but watching The Wire does put our boys in blue in perspective. Mostly cause half of them aren’t even in blue. Decieving buggers.
Tonight though, I encountered two policemen doing very unexpected things. I was driving with Ms. M and Mr. B. B. and I was standing at a stoplight, waiting for the green light. Of course, because this is Israel, a woman in a hideous white SUV tried to push in front of me so she could turn left. A cop car was a few cars behind me, and a very pissed off elderly cop actually made the effort to get out of his car and go up to her window and yell at her to get back into her lane and not inconvenience everyone else and hold up traffic. Of course she ended up turning left illeagaly anyway, but still, the point was made.
The second thing that happened tonight was again, at a stoplight. This time the squad car was in front. A man walked up to the window and seemingly asked directions. Then he smilingly got into the front seat of the car. Meaning the policeman inside offered a lift. This is another piece of courtesy that is unknown of here.
Next post might or might not mention if Paul McCartney was or was not assassinated during his concert here that is tomorrow night.
I did the sex-ID quiz that Chris left in a comment a few posts back [ http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbody/sex/index_cookie.shtml ] and apparently my mind is almost exactly between the male and female minds. I lean more towards the women’s mind, but not by much.
This would make sense – I like girly things like shopping, but I can be rather agressive or violent; I’m super empathic, and yet I blow people’s brains out on GTA. I used to be a tomboy, and now I’m rather girly. I know, I’m playing at stereotypes here, but it makes sense.
Still, I find it amusing that although I am very clearly and physically female, my brain is genderless. My brain is totally fucking the system. Cool.
Just to write a short disclaimer, because I don’t want anyone to get the wrong idea about that comic: I’m all for transvestites, transgenders and sexual freedom. I absolutely adore Frank N’ Furter. I just don’t want to have a beard…
TA-DUM-ta-ta-dum-ta-ta-ta-TA-TA-DUM-ta-ta-ta-ta-dum-TA-DUM!
Every soundtrack of every action film ever made is the exact same thing. Same rhythm. Same tones. Same beat. It’s amazing that we still enjoy action movies at all. And yet we do – we all still shiver in our seats when that music blares out of the movie-theater speakers. Some of us just develop this mechanism not to recognize the dull fact that we’re seeing the same things over and over, doing the same things again and again.
Another example of this are those people who forget jokes. You can tell them the same ole’ knock-knock jokes five times in a month and they’ll still burst out laughing every time and say that “That was a good one! I’ve never heard it before!” It’s rather incredible if you think about it.
I suppose it’s lucky though, because if we didn’t have that as human beings then we’d realize how amazingly boring our routines can be. We’d need to go out and complete more and more insane stunts to keep ourselves interested. Actually, come to think of it, that’s not a bad idea – there are too many people on the planet anyway.
Being a loyal and dedicated fan of anything is a problem. Do you want to know why? Well, I’ll tell you why.
First, inevitably, none of your friends will be fans of the same thing. They’ll either look down on you because of your fandom, or they’ll just pity and ridicule you fondly for it every chance they get. Either way, you’re alone in this except for strangers you might meet and befriend through your fandom.
Second, you’ll waste money to no end. No matter what it is, be it merchandise or new music or tickets or rare items, you HAVE to have it. You just have to. Your world won’t be complete without every single artifact you can find that has to do with your fandom.
Third, you will be branded something extreme – emo, football freak, Trekkie – even if you’re relatively healthy and don’t spend all of your time on forums and at events.
Fourth and finally, society at large seems to find it amiss when we fans scream and yell and gather for some reason or other and often we will have a hard time fitting in if we don’t learn to curb our enthusiasm and find some topics of conversation that don’t have to do with our love.
Conclusion? It’s obvious, of course! Love nothing to the extreme and succumb to the mediocrity of society and of life! Then we’ll all be happy. In a mediocer way at least.
But sometimes I am the typical GIRL – as the joy of my purchase of a belt and sweatshirt from an adorable indie shop proves. As much of a tomboy as I can be, as male-like crude, as much of a gamer as I am, I still sometimes have to give myself over to absolute girlyness.
Another thing I do that screams “stereotypical FEMALE” is doodling. This is a behavior that’s been reinforced by long hours of listening to lectures about Sharing and Clients and Real Customer Service and Loyalty. Meaning my job so far. My doodling consist mostly of inanimate objects who are smiling or frowning or yawning, all in an excruciatingly cute manner. It makes me rather ill to contemplate it now.
Perhaps my pen is conspirating against me, because every time I want to doodle something pretty or creative, another smily-faced food or drop or bubble comes out. After all, the pen is mightier and all that. I can totally believe this of my pen. The bastard.
Some comic relief. The comic part being my Paint-drawing skills and the relief being the lack of words. 
Slightly Ignorant 